I’m Taking August Off, Kinda

Brain rot and totally ok with it

I have been staring at a blank note in my phone for like 30 minutes trying to figure out what to write this week and nothing is coming, genuinely nothing, and normally I’d feel weird admitting that because I feel like I’m supposed to always have some deep take or a lesson I learned but honestly my brain feels rotted. My brain will not let me consume.. it doesn’t want a podcast, it doesn’t want a book, it doesn’t even want to doom scroll tiktok! I’m currently watching some cheesy hallmark show that doesn’t require me to pay close attention and it’s all I can handle.

And I think the timing actually makes sense because today was my last launch of the summer, and I don’t have anything else going until mid September, and I think my body knew that before I did because the second that launch went live I just kind of deflated, in a good way.. like when you’ve been holding your stomach in all through dinner and you finally get to unbutton the jeans and breathe.

I don’t think people really talk about what creative burnout looks like when your job is also your personality, if that makes sense.. it’s not the dramatic version where you’re crying in the shower, it’s more like you just feel a little bit hollow, like you’re going through the motions of being interesting, and normally that would freak me out because my whole thing is having something to say, but this time I’m just letting it happen because I think I actually know why it’s happening. I’ve been in launch mode basically nonstop and my brain just needs a second to not be “on” a calendar.

So August is going to be different. I’m doing the West Coast for a large chunk of it, some traveling, probably posting way less than usual and I’m not even a little sorry about that. I don’t have another launch until mid September, which means for the first time in a really long time I get an entire month where I’m not trying to sell anyone anything. No countdown, no “link in bio,” - just me, wearing my own www clothes because I actually want to, doing the things I want to. And of course when it feels good and I have something to share, I will post about it! My daily looks, product recommendations, it’s not like I actually intend on going dark!

One of the parts I’m most excited about, getting to wear the last few collections just because I love them, not because I’m trying to move inventory. I get to fall back in love with my own work in a really organic way.

Normally by this point in summer I’d already be on some trip to Europe, deep house on repeat, the whole Ibiza-adjacent thing I usually love, and this year I just have zero pull toward it, which for me is kind of wild. And instead I’ve been way more into mountain time and barbecues and just being around family and loved ones. I’m kind of obsessed with how good it feels. There’s something about not performing a big glamorous summer and just having a chill one that feels like the most luxurious thing I could possibly do right now.

This summer is also making me remember that I have a whole other side of myself that has nothing to do with fashion or my phone. I actually grew up pretty athletic and I love golf and tennis and horseback riding, and those are things I never really get to do because I’m always working or shooting or on a plane or partying at a members club. I forgot how good it feels to just be moving my body. Not that I’m fully off the grid about it, I’ll still snap a cute photo on the horse, let’s not get crazy, but it’s different when the photo is a bonus and not the whole point of the day.

Right now I just want the version of summer where nothing is scheduled and nothing needs a caption, where I’m meeting new people and leaning into whatever feels good in the moment instead of what looks good on a grid.

So yeah, brain rot, burnout, whatever you want to call it, I’m not scared of it. I think it just means I finally know myself well enough to recognize when I need to pull back.

Fourteen years into this, being okay with doing absolutely nothing for a minute feels pretty cool.

Substack is where I’ll be sharing updates along the way, so subscribe for the August updates. I may even try something new here for the first time… stay tuned.

More reads:

Things I Spend Money On That Are SO Worth It

The Summer I Didn’t Know I Needed

Inside My Company: What I Got Wrong About Being a Boss